Post by ConqueringWolf on Feb 8, 2004 23:52:05 GMT -5
In Honor of Stupid People
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed
through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
( Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap -- " Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."( but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- " Do not turn
upside down."(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after
heating."(...and you thought?
...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- " Do not iron clothes on xbody."( but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- " Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- " Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed
through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
( Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap -- " Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."( but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- " Do not turn
upside down."(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after
heating."(...and you thought?
...)On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- " Do not iron clothes on xbody."( but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- " Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- " Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
